


“I’m the Abs-olute Boyf Material” aka the Five Times it Takes Wu Yifan aka Kris to Realize That He’s Most Definitely Gay For His Best-friend

by unclassified_senpai



Category: EXO (Band)
Genre: +1, 5 Times, A little bit crack, Chenmin, Fluff, Friends to Lovers, KrisHo - Freeform, M/M, Potatoes, Realization, Romance, Slice of Life, XiuChen - Freeform, but its honestly not that deep, but kyungsoo is really nice, chanyeol and baekhyun live in permanent fear of kyungsoo, hes trying to be woke, i love xiuchen, junmyeon is kinda dumb too, junmyeon is suffering, kris has like 1000 existential crisis and mind-breaking realizations, kris is a potato, kris is really dumb, krisho are dumb, side xiuchen - Freeform, xiuchen are cute and gross
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-10-20
Updated: 2017-10-20
Packaged: 2019-01-17 09:14:03
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 16,088
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12362505
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/unclassified_senpai/pseuds/unclassified_senpai
Summary: Or also known as the AU where Junmyeon suffers because of BaekChen and has too much patience with everyone, Kris is obliviously in love with his best-friend, and XiuChen are couple goals.Everyone else is just extremely amused and sometimes exasperated.





	“I’m the Abs-olute Boyf Material” aka the Five Times it Takes Wu Yifan aka Kris to Realize That He’s Most Definitely Gay For His Best-friend

 

 

 

Junmyeon blames this entirely on Baekhyun.

Wait. That wasn’t fair.

He blames this on Baekhyun _and_ Jongdae. They’re both apologetic about it, or at least try to be.

‘Look, we were doing the world a service by posting that picture-‘ Baekhyun tries to reason.

‘-you’re taking this the wrong way- this is a _good_ thing-‘ Jongdae tries to reassure him.

‘Taken without my _permission_ \- I could _sue_ you!’ Junmyeon would stay back and flog the two if it weren’t for the fact that he was already running late for a very important presentation for his _Modern Literature Appreciation_ class and his professor was an asshole waiting for anyone to mess up so that he could spend 30 minutes lecturing the entire class on the danger of tardiness in a “ _real life working environment- your generation don’t appreciate anything anymore”_ and honestly, Junmyeon would rather not be the reason for that. So instead Junmyeon just turns and walks away, but promptly collides into Kris’s chest which materialized out of nowhere. Owner of said chest looks down in mild surprise, as though he hadn’t seen Junmyeon in the first place.

‘Oh hey,’ Kris waves in a friendly way despite looking angry 25/8. It was a talent.

‘Is this a congregation of short people?’ Chanyeol grins, appearing behind Kris.

‘Look-‘ Baekhyun begins hotly.

‘Who are you calling short?’

Chanyeol starts at the deep voice which technically shouldn’t be eliciting such a violent reaction from Chanyeol but experience has taught the latter to be careful. Baekhyun steps away to hide behind Kris who looks confused.

Confused _and_ angry. Again, another talent.

‘No one!’ Chanyeol grins and it’s only just a little forced before turning to address Junmyeon, ‘Nice picture by the way.’

‘That was our doing!’ Jongdae and Baekhyun say at the same time, clearly vying for glory.

‘Obviously.’ A new voice chimes in from behind the two.

‘Minseok!’ Jongdae smiles brightly even before turning to greet his boyfriend.

‘Kyungsoo- why aren’t you in class already? We’re both going to be late,’ Junmyeon is practically hopping on his feet from sheer agitation. His presentation speech reeling in double speed in his mind. If needed, he could _rap_ this presentation to the professor.

‘Class is cancelled,’ Kyungsoo explains simply, reaching for his phone and showing Junmyeon the announcement on their faculty’s official FaceBook page.

Junmyeon immediately stops his fidgeting and he could start singing from joy. Instead he gives Kris a violently strong high-five and silently cheers. Kris winces, holding his hand up gingerly as he waits for the stinging to abate but nonetheless gives his best-friend a genuine smile in reply. Baekhyun looks away as though embarrassed and that brings another one of Junmyeon’s stress over to the front again.

‘Yo _u-!’_ Junmyeon reaches behind Kris, trying to get his hands on Baekhyun who jumps away with surprisingly flexible reflexes.

‘IT WASN’T JUST ME! JONGDAE TOO!’ Baekhyun shrieks.

Junmyeon looks over at the aforementioned Performance Arts student but finds that he’s taking shelter behind Minseok.

‘It was _your_ Instagram account!’ Junmyeon decides he’d rather not face Minseok’s inhuman strength and rounds up Baekhyun again.

‘I hate the fact that you have a boyfriend that scares everyone,’ Baekhyun hisses at Jongdae who is latched onto his boyfriend’s side with a happy sated smile, reminding Junmyeon of a happy cat. Minseok absentmindedly raises a hand, striking a _peace_ sign with his fingers, never looking up from his book once.

‘ _Couples_.’ Kyungsoo mumbles before grasping Chanyeol’s nape in an iron grip. ‘You owe me food. You’re buying me food now.’ And drags Chanyeol away by the end of his hoodie. Chanyeol’s grin is definitely forced now as he pleads at Junmyeon to save him with large puppy-eyes. But Junmyeon is immune. And he did call Junmyeon short, so he just waves blithely at Chanyeol before turning to lecture Baekhyun. But he’s stopped as well, when Kris pulls at his shirt sleeve. He’s not even using any strength but Junmyeon finds himself stopping anyways.

‘What’s going on?’ Kris asks as he ignores a mildly complaining Minseok who is being attacked with small kisses from Jongdae though he’s not moving away.

‘This,’ Baekhyun produces his phone from behind Kris, page ready. Junmyeon can feel his face burning red, wanting to hide the picture from Kris for reasons he couldn’t rightly name ( _lies_ \- a voice that sounded a bit too uncannily like Kyungsoo’s whispers in his ear). It wasn’t as though Kris didn’t know about it. But he’s still mortified. He had been alerted that morning as he took his usual 15 minute walk to university, his phone blowing up with notifications. He had just switched off his phone, not knowing how to feel or react.

But before the phone is taken up by Kris there’s a loud yell of ‘Hey Kim, will you let me _boyf_ you up? We’d look good together!’ and Junmyeon could just die. That wasn’t the first time he’d been _cat-called_ that morning though it’s literally only been 30 minutes.

Kris looks understandably bewildered, gawking at the guy who just yelled, looking doubly angry.

‘Which Kim though?’ Baekhyun jokes in a low voice to himself and Jongdae glares at him, reaching over for Minseok as though to hide the latter from view. Not that it mattered. Minseok was well known all over the university as a very well built and athletic senior but was known even more so for the ink that covered almost every inch of his body and the assortment of piercings he had. But what was most known about him was the fact that he was practically married to Jongdae, a sophomore from the Performance Arts faculty since they were of ages 12 and 14. If you didn’t know this, then Jongdae would waste no time in telling you so- in great detail. He might even perform a musical based on their love-life and though he was very good at singing, no one needed to hear a 5 minute ode dedicated to Minseok’s smile. They made an odd albeit cute couple. So Jongdae’s “protective” move technically has no benefit other than allowing the latter to drape himself over his better half. 

‘Wait what?’ Kris looks doubly confused.

‘I realize that this is a great opportunity for you to make money,’ Jongdae says seriously as he properly latches himself onto Minseok whose nose is buried in a large textbook ( _smart and hot as fuck too! How and when did I get so lucky?!)_.

‘I am not selling myself online for money,’ Junmyeon deadpans.

Kris chokes violently on air before he splutters out, ‘What the fuck?!’

‘Someone explain to him before he dies.’ Minseok says in his quiet voice, not lifting his eyes from the book. ‘Or someone dies.’

Kris looks downright murderous and honestly, if Junmyeon didn’t find it attractive, he would be nervous just like Baekhyun.

‘Here. Look,’ Baekhyun shoves his phone at Kris who fumbles with the device before looking at the screen and then chokes again before laughing out loud.

‘Ok…that wasn’t the reaction I was expecting,’ Jongdae comments in an amused fashion. Even Minseok looks up briefly, evidently surprised.

‘Stop laughing at my misery!’ Junmyeon hisses, trying to grab the phone from Kris to delete the damned picture off of Baekhyun’s Instagram. But Kris is tall and he holds the phone up, actually even _zooming_ into the offending picture. ‘And fuck you for pretty much having the entire university population on your account! I should really sue you for exploiting my privacy!’

Junmyeon had gotten caught in the rain from the other day and Baekhyun, being one of the few who lived in the university dorms, had offered to loan Junmyeon dry clothes at his room. Junmyeon didn’t know Baekhyun had taken a picture of him changing his shirt out, hair damp, and very well defined abs on full display. Baekhyun then posted said picture onto his Instagram, captioning it “ _How is he still single? Smart, 99% Ultimate Boyf, rich, and wow dem abs- someone hook ma man @Kim_Junmyn with a date. I’ll chaperone” #sortofsexyanddefinitelyreadytomingle #trustmehesgreat #hasalotoflamejokestho #butthatshischarm #bonushelooksreallygoodwithglasses #realgoodtoshowofftoparentstoo #greatGPA_

‘I mean- you’re not wrong,’ Kris laughs nodding at Baekhyun as he scrolls through the comments, slinging an arm around Junmyeon. ‘Look at you- raking in all these thirsty comments.’

Kris sounds _proud_. Junmyeon facepalms, hoping his face wasn’t flushed. Baekhyun and Jongdae, now sure they weren’t going to be killed, jump up, patting themselves on the back and pointing out their favorite comments to Kris who still looks unnecessarily proud.

‘Why do I even like that idiot,’ Junmyeon mumbles to himself very quietly, but Minseok seems to hear him.

‘I ask myself that every day,’ Minseok replies wryly, still not looking up from his book.

Baekhyun takes back his phone and he and Kris get ready to leave for their shared class. Their professor was chill, and didn’t feel the need to be ruthless to ‘ _all you millenials’_ at every given opportunity.

‘Well- we should get going,’ Kris says before adding with a careful scanning look at Junmyeon, ‘Go get some sleep Myeon, I’ll come over later with ice-cream.’

Kris grins one last time, winking at Junmyeon as though impossibly amused, and waves goodbye to all of them before leaving with Baekhyun for their class.

‘Do you want me to talk to him?’ Minseok asks, his voice serious and genuine. Jongdae looks equally serious. Junmyeon snorts, shaking his head.

‘Honestly- it’s fine,’ Junmyeon shrugs ruefully.

Junmyeon always knew that he liked Kris more than just a best-friend should, ever since they met when they were 15 and Kris had been shorter than him. But he had long come to accept that fact that Kris didn’t like him that way. And it honestly didn’t bother him anymore. It’s been 8 years now and Junmyeon has dated in the past few years but his feelings just seemed to lurk around all the time. And he doesn’t feel jealous (anymore) when Kris dates or flirts (though the latter never did much of it- he wasn’t looking for a relationship apparently). But the main issue here being Kris was _very straight._ Kris claimed he didn’t have a preference but so far, Kris’s track record has consistently been female. Junmyeon himself didn’t follow on specifics but he dated indiscriminately and has had seen both girls and guys in the past though the relationships never lasted long and barely went past a few dates.

Junmyeon’s overall resolve would have been secure. If it weren’t for the fact that there are (frequent) times when Kris does some things. Like noticing without being told that Junmyeon hasn’t had a good night’s sleep in a few days with just one look, and offering to bring him ice-cream because once Junmyeon naps his motivation to leave his room is sub-zero. And it wasn’t as though he was doing this just because Kris was just _that nice_ \- Junmyeon has witnessed Kris not giving his sweater to his _date_ when she said she was cold, but instead gave it to Junmyeon because he _sneezed_. And it wasn’t even because of the cold but because of spring allergies. And Kris _knew_ that. Kris would even buy him flowers to cheer him up and has, several times, bought him chocolates for valentines despite having his own date or a girlfriend at the time. Or he would wait for Junmyeon outside his classroom, leaning against a wall, and he’d have food for Junmyeon.

Kris (probably) calls it being well-mannered and being a good friend. Junmyeon calls it an (welcomed) attack.

Minseok gives him a look- not of pity or annoyance. But rather a look of compassion and understanding.

‘He’ll come around- I’m sure of it,’ he says with so much surety that Junmyeon is taken aback for a moment.

He recovers, and chuckling, Junmyeon smiles and says, ‘Who knows, maybe Baekhyun’s hashtags will resound inside his head.’

Minseok and Jongdae burst out into laughter.

‘Hashtag _Abs-olute Boyf_ Material,’ Jongdae cackles, looping his arms through his and Minseok’s.

‘Please don’t.’

 

 

 

 

#1

 

 

Kris picks up a few of the cones that he knows are Junmyeon’s favorites before paying for his stuff at the counter. Jongin waves blithely at him from behind the counter.

‘Hey hyung,’ he greets. ‘Junmyeon-hyung not here?’

‘His class got cancelled,’ Kris replies, no longer surprised that people just automatically assumed they would be together everywhere. Sometimes Kris himself is surprised when he looks to his right and Junmyeon isn’t there.

‘Ah,’ Jongin breaks out into a rather sly grin before he says, ‘So- that post eh?’

‘What post- oh, Baek’s Instagram?’ Kris asks as he grabs the bag from Jongin, waiting for his change.

‘Yeah- Baek-hyung has so many followers- one of my seniors from my class asked me if Baekhyun was being serious or not- she seemed really keen on introducing herself to Junmyeon-hyung.’ Jongin explains as he pulls out his bill.

Kris rolls his eyes.

‘She said his face wasn’t his type- but his body was totally “up her alley”,’ Jongin raises his fingers in air-quotes.

A ripple of annoyance runs through Kris and he scowls as he pockets his change.

‘Did you give her his contact information?’ he pushes.

‘No? But I think she might have messaged him,’ Jongin grins, amused. ‘Don’t worry hyung- Junmyeon-hyung knows that Instagram messages are basically the equivalent to booty-calls.’

Grunting a sort of goodbye, Kris leaves the 7-11, feeling weirdly annoyed. Junmyeon has been his best-friend- the _best_ best-friend _ever for_ just over 8 years now. And Junmyeon was honestly one of the best, if not _the_ best, person he’s ever met. Incredibly hardworking, loyal, respectful, polite, but never a pushover, intelligent but unassuming; and most of all, warm and caring almost to a fault.

To an extent, Kris felt like Junmyeon’s personal guard- protecting the latter from others who would take advantage of his infinite kindness and acceptance. He frowns as he thinks about the nearly 5000 likes Junmyeon’s candid picture had garnered and thinks that he should definitely have a talk with Baekhyun next time he sees his classmate.

Kris lived a little outside of the university zone, close enough but not too close to university in a way that made him feel like he never left the grounds. Junmyeon lived in the same apartment system as him and they were neighbours for the past 3 years. Foregoing his own door, Kris knocks briefly on Junmyeon’s door before letting himself in a few seconds later. They both had each other’s keys, mainly for security reasons. They were also each other’s emergency contacts according to their university registration, medical insurance, and police-forms. It was somehow simpler and especially for Kris as his only relative, his mother, wasn’t even in the same country.

Junmyeon is at his desk, in front of his laptop though he was staring at his phone, eyebrows furrowed. He looked exhausted and Kris knew it wasn’t because of his workload. Junmyeon looks up briefly, smiling vaguely in greeting and reaching up for the ice-cream at once.

‘Hey- how’s everything?’ Kris asks, handing him the cone and digging out his own as he throws himself on the couch.

‘They settled the property issue earlier this morning,’ Junmyeon explains, attempting to open his ice-cream with one hand while the other typed along the screen of his phone. Kris removes the ice-cream from his hand and unwraps it before handing it back.

Junmyeon’s parents were going through a divorce. And though it was a joint decision, one that Junmyeon had long seen coming, it was still causing heavy repercussions through the Kim family household. Kris wishes he could be of more help- in what way he’s not sure, but the first few years of coming here had been spent in Junmyeon’s house. So he was very familiar with Junmyeon’s family, and they had been nothing but warm and welcoming towards him. Even now, when his mother sent Junmyeon his care-packages, she included a sizeable, if not equal, amount of goodies for him as well. If it weren’t for Mrs. Kim’s kimchi, Kris would have died a starving students years ago.

‘That’s…good?’ Kris tries.

Junmyeon gives him an amused smile.

‘Yeah- not bad I guess. The house is going is still going to noona, and I’m getting the property back home,’ Junmyeon puts away his phone, concentrating on his ice-cream now.

‘Nice- so I know I have a place to crash in the future,’ Kris grins over his ice-cream.

Junmyeon snorts, rolling his eyes before mumbling, ‘Freeloader.’

‘Hey- I _bought_ you this ice-cream with my own money,’ Kris pretends to be offended.

‘Uh-huh, sure.’

‘So- been getting any booty calls?’

Predictably, Junmyeon chokes, throwing a glare at Kris.

‘What are you talking about?’ he demands, wiping at his mouth.

‘Check your Instagram,’ Kris grins, leaning back on the couch, nodding at Junmyeon’s phone.

Looking wary, Junmyeon reaches for his phone.

Kris watches carefully as Junmyeon’s expression shifts to one of surprise for a while, before he’s making a few taps, eyebrows slightly furrowed. Kris reaches for the box of tissue on the side of the window-sill and hands it to Junmyeon right after he chokes again.

‘What- what is this?!’ Junmyeon demands, thrusting the device at Kris.

Kris takes it and finds that there are over 200 messages on Junmyeon’s Instagram as well as over 1000 new likes on his posts. Junmyeon wasn’t much of a social media user but he did occasionally post up a scenic picture or a group picture. There’s a picture of Junmyeon and himself and Kris notes that it’s the one with the most comments and likes. Curious, he taps on it and scrolls through the pictures.

‘ _Is this his boyfriend?’_

_‘Wait- I’ve seen them in uni tho? Thought he was single?’_

_‘Damn- they’re cute tgther tho?’_

And other similar comments. Some are trolls, posting something occasionally homophobic. Kris immediately reports their accounts, knowing that Junmyeon would probably never really go through the comments and not know. He goes back to the messages while Junmyeon continues to groan.

‘ _Hey cutie- wanna hang around sometime?’_ and attached was a phone number. Most of the messages were in that vein and Kris closes the application, putting the phone away with a snort.

‘I’m just trying to stay _healthy_ ,’ Junmyeon says with emphasis. ‘Why is this coming back to bite me in the ass?’

‘Good ass though.’

Junmyeon’s unimpressed glare makes Kris burst out into laughter.

‘Just ignore it Myeon,’ Kris nudges Junmyeon’s foot with his own. ‘Let them appreciate what should be appreciated.’

Kris wasn’t blind. Junmyeon was an incredibly handsome man with good balanced features. If his best-friend was finally going to get the recognition he deserved for his underappreciated visuals, then he was happy for him.

‘There’s a very _very_ LARGE line between “appreciation” and “objectification” and I would really prefer not to face the latter,’ Junmyeon huffs before standing up and declaring, ‘Is this what women go through on a daily basis? What the actual fuck? That’s it- I’m going to kill Baekhyun- maybe being a felon will stop all of this.’

Kris is quick to pull Junmyeon over to the couch, throwing his legs over his lap to lock him in place before saying, ‘Are you kidding me? Don’t you know that felons are considered really attractive? People really lap-up the whole bad-boy image- they want to _reform_ them and all that.’

‘Mainstream media is so freaking messed up I can’t believe this sort of BS that goes around-‘ Junmyeon is fuming and Kris finds it adorable how Junmyeon can’t really get himself to fully swear out loud.

‘It’ll die down,’ Kris says in his most reassuring tone, going back to his ice-cream. ‘Instagram glory dies pretty quickly. And if anyone objectifies you, I’ll go and kill them- I pull off the bad-boy look better anyways.’

‘You’re about as threatening as a potato.’

Kris chokes on his ice-cream as he laughs, splattering ice-cream around. Junmyeon throws him a tissue with a disgusted expression on his face.

‘Hey- potatoes are painful if thrown accurately.’

‘Sure thing- now let me go Tuber-Man, I have papers to write.’

Mumbling under his breath, Junmyeon moves about getting his books and notes. Kris notices that Junmyeon’s phone lights up and it’s an Instagram notification. Unlocking Junmyeon’s phone with his own fingerprint (because it made accessing each other’s Spotify playlists easier when they were in the car and had to hook up their phones to the aux), Kris opens up the app. It’s another message and feeling a flare of irritation at the obvious “booty call” message inside, he goes to Junmyeon’s settings and disables the message allowance. Did Junmyeon even know this option was available?

‘Myeon- do you want any of these messages? For lols?’ Kris calls.

‘Please don’t say “lols”.’

‘Is that a no?’

‘It’s a no.’

With perhaps too much satisfaction and glee, Kris deletes all of the messages.

 

 

*

 

The next morning Junmyeon finds window boxes next to his door, earth freshly tilled, with a bunch of potato sprouts already leafing and budding to decent sized leaves and stalks. There’s a paper stuck on a stand in the middle of the sprouts and Junmyeon, already laughing, turns it over and it reads: ‘ _Tuber Man sends his regards.’_

 

*

 

Kris’s phone buzzes with a notification from Instagram in the middle of his lecture. Discreetly checking his phone, he grins to himself at the picture Junmyeon has posted titled: ‘ _Potatoes can be threatening I guess’._

 

 

 

 

#2

 

 

 

‘Uh-‘

Kris looks down at the petite girl in question with an impatient foot-tap. This was his last class for the week and he had a long weekend to look forward to. He was gonna meet Junmyeon at the mall nearby to catch the Wonder Woman movie and he was _so ready_ for some high quality DC action (anything but Batman VS Superman dear god) but here was this short representative of the female human population and Kris just really wants to leave already.

‘Yes?’ Kris asks pointedly.

‘I uh- um, you’re Junmyeon’s friend right?’ she asks hesitantly.

This gives Kris some pause, looking at her properly. He doesn’t recognize her from any of _his_ class. He also doesn’t know her through extension from Junmyeon.

‘Yes?’

‘Oh- uh, could you give this to him?’ she hands him an honest to god envelope and Kris wonders if he’s suddenly been transported into a Shouju-Anime centered around a typical Japanese high-school for a moment.

‘What-?’

‘Thank you!’

She shoves it into his hand and fairly runs off. Kris gawks a while before he’s being pushed from the back.

‘Fan- you’re too tall to be standing around like this,’ Lu Han elbows him with his knobby elbow, making Kris wince. ‘What’s that? A love letter?’

‘Probably- not for me-‘

‘-ah, Junmyeon,’ Lu Han snorts, throwing his head back. ‘How’s he holding up?’

‘Not very well,’ Kris replies grimly, wondering if he should just throw the envelope.

‘Give it to him, see his expression,’ Lu Han grins wickedly.

‘You’re an asshole with the face of an angel,’ Kris deadpans.

‘Don’t I know it,’ Lu Han replies cockily. ‘Well- this angel needs to get back to heaven so _hallelujah, forgive us, our trespasses that we may forgive others_ because guess who’s gonna get trashed tonight!’

‘It’s only been a month since uni started!’ Kris barks after the gangly Journalism student.

‘Exactly! Gonna get my flute blown!’ Lu Han hip thrusts violently making unnecessarily loud sound effects. A few people around him give him scandalized looks but Lu Han ignores them and skips away, an evil grin set on his face (described as angelic by many people, but Kris knows better). Shaking his head, Kris pockets the envelope and makes his way out. Or at least tries to.

‘Hey- Kevin right?’

‘Kris,’ he replies tersely, eyeing the unidentified male who stepped up before him, blocking his way. He was tall (not as tall as Kris), had soft-brown hair, and was immaculately dressed. Kris guesses he was probably from the BBA faculty or something related to business.

‘Yeah- cool. So like, you and Kim banging or something?’ he asks.

‘I beg your pardon?’

‘I just wanted to know- word is that you two are together- but some say you’re just friends,’ he looks at Kris expectantly.

‘You have 5 seconds to get the fuck out of my face,’ Kris says evenly.

The guy seemed inclined to argue but _Minseok_ appears out of nowhere, cocking one eyebrow at the scene. For someone so short, Minseok sure exuded a deadly aura.

‘Hey- everything all right?’

‘O-oh! Yes! Fine! Bye Kevin!’

Minseok watches with distaste as the guy makes his escape.

‘You know- I’ve been asked for Junmyeon’s number twice in the past 3 days,’ Minseok rolls his eyes. ‘Dae’s been asked more than that too.’

Kris frowns at that.

‘What?’

‘He didn’t tell you?’ Minseok raises one pierced eyebrow up.

‘I…don’t know why Jongdae would tell me this?’

Minseok rolls his eyes so hard Kris wouldn’t be surprised if they rolled all the way back into his head. Was that even possible? He could ask Minseok, seeing as he was a medical student, but Kris is pretty sure he’ll receive another eye-roll. Minseok sighs, briefly licking his lip and Kris sees a flash of his tongue piercing.

‘I meant Junmyeon.’

‘No? He’s being asked?’ Kris feels a little bit dumb. And Minseok’s expression tells him as much as well.

‘Aren’t you supposed to be somewhere?’ Minseok asks instead.

Kris marathon-times to the mall, panting as he walks up to Junmyeon who was carrying a rather large bouquet of flowers in his hands. Junmyeon’s dressed in a casual button-down and jeans, his normal sling-bag set around his shoulders. He looks a little confused, as though he didn’t know what exactly it was he was holding. It’s possibly a bit too aesthetically pleasing. Junmyeon’s standing in front of the climber covered wall, sun shining down on him. The soft grey of his shirt makes a pleasing backdrop for the pastel rosy pink of the flowers in his hands.

Okay- not what he was expecting and it somehow paints a very nice image to Kris’s eyes.

Junmyeon spots him and he looks relieved. Somehow this makes Kris in turn feel relieved.

‘Hey- what’s this?’ Kris asks, nodding at the flowers.

‘A present?’

‘Why do you sound unsure?’

‘Because I am unsure,’ Junmyeon grimaces. ‘A girl just came up and gave it to me. I told her I couldn’t accept it but she insisted.’

‘That…sounds like what happened to me.’

‘You’re not holding flowers though,’ Junmyeon points out.

‘Not for me,’ Kris rolls his eyes, taking out the envelope from his pocket and Junmyeon is already groaning.

‘Was she about this tall- hair this long?’ Junmyeon asks, not even attempting to take the envelope.

‘Yes?’ Kris is bewildered.

Junmyeon sighs heavily. ‘Yeah she’s approached me before, _twice_ \- same envelope. Didn’t know she was going to approach you. Sorry you had to go through that.’

Kris feels another twinge of annoyance. Why was Junmyeon apologizing? This wasn’t his fault in the slightest. Kris wants to _burn_ those flowers now.

‘We should go get the tickets- these flowers are actually pretty, it’s why I’m saving them-‘ Junmyeon is saying.

‘Here- gimme,’ Kris takes the flowers from Junmyeon, looks around briefly before spotting an elderly woman by the fountains outside the entrance.

‘Kris-‘ Junmyeon has his _this-is-not-a-good-idea-I’m-stopping-you-now_ voice on but Kris ignores it. Walking up to the woman, Kris smiles his best smile, one that he knows works, and hands the bouquet over to the woman.

‘Oh!’

‘Please enjoy your day madam.’ He smiles.

‘Why- thank you,’ she chuckles, taking the flowers delightedly. ‘Is this a new service in this mall?’

‘Yes madam,’ Kris smiles.

‘How nice- thank you!’ she chuckles again, walking out leisurely and sniffing the flowers.

Junmyeon is still standing there, an exasperated but fond expression on his face. Kris can’t help but feel proud of himself, especially when Junmyeon smiles at him.

The thing about Junmyeon was that he wasn’t _instantly_ noticeable. When he was with friends, he wasn’t always noticed immediately. Eyes fell either on Kris himself, or on Minseok, or on Baekhyun for being so loud. While Kris thinks that it was pretty good that Junmyeon was receiving _some_ attention in regards to his overall _existence_ as a whole (because Kim Junmyeon needs to be appreciated more for being such an exemplary human being- _thank you Mr. and Mrs. Kim for having sex and giving birth to this man_ ), he wasn’t too sure anymore now. Junmyeon looked uncomfortable and with everything that was happening so far, he was probably more than just stressed.

‘You just made her day,’ Junmyeon grins.

‘Yeah well- if you want pretty flowers I’ll fucking buy you pretty flowers,’ Kris does his best to scowl. He makes a mental note to buy as many peonies as possible from the closest flower shop.

Junmyeon throws his head back as he laughs, the sound of it curing the headache Kris hadn’t realized he had going on. Throwing his arm around his shorter friend Kris adds, ‘Come on- let’s go watch Gal Gadot kick ass.’

Junmyeon seemed to be feeling much better as they wait in line. They saw a few of their mutual friends and waved at them as they passed. That is until they’re in line for the tickets and a few fellow university students are in front of them, whispering amongst themselves the moment they spy them.

‘But isn’t that tall Chinese man his boyfriend or something-‘

‘Is that all I am to this university,’ Kris whispers in amusement into Junmyeon’s ear. Unlike the students in front of them, they’re actually trying not to be heard. ‘The “tall Chinese man”, you’d think they’d get a little more creative- I mean, Tao is Chinese _and_ tall too.’

Junmyeon elbows him in reply, his face heating up and looking like he couldn’t hear.  

They’re spared from anymore whispers once they’re inside the movie theater and Junmyeon finally relaxes, leaning into Kris’s side with a silent groan.

‘…I honestly didn’t know it was going to be this bad,’ he says as trailers start to play. Kris leans in further to listen better and nearly jumps out of his skin when Junmyeon’s lips graze his ears.

‘You okay?’ Junmyeon asks, looking worried. ‘Is it the seat-?’

‘No- it’s all right,’ Kris replies hastily, lowering his voice as the cinema lights died down.

Kris questions himself throughout the beginning of the movie. Why had he reacted like that? It wouldn’t be the first time something like that has happened. He’s kissed Junmyeon before, and Junmyeon’s kissed him before too; of course they were all regular, friendly, _bro_ kisses on the forehead or cheek. Kris sometimes liked to chase Junmyeon, pressing slobbery kisses on his best-friend’s cringing face.

‘You sure? Kris.’ Junmyeon has his _I-am-being-serious-don’t-mess-with-me_ voice that works on everyone: children, teens, classmates, professors, grown ass adults, animals, and possibly even plants.

‘Yeah- no,’ Kris pushes all thoughts away and gives Junmyeon his best smile despite the lack of light. ‘All’s good Myeon- and you have my popcorn.’

Junmyeon accepts his response and he switches the caramel popcorn in his hand with the regular popcorn in Kris’s hand. In the end they’ll both end up eating from each other’s buckets but that’s not important.

They leave the theater in high spirits and Kris makes Junmyeon nearly cry with laughter when he tells him that he was now inspired to dress like Wonder Woman for Halloween that year.

‘No- please- you _have_ to do it!’ Junmyeon chokes out, wiping at his eyes where he really does have tears.

‘Kris!’

Looking around, Kris catches sight of Yixing who waves even more when he spots Junmyeon as well.

‘Hey- I’m using the restroom real quick,’ Junmyeon nudges him, still hiccupping from laughter. ‘I’ll come to you.’

Kris nods before making his way towards Yixing.

‘Hey Fan,’ Yixing waves merrily, sloshing out coke from his Wonder Woman cup, nearly showering an unsuspecting 6 year old with soda.

‘Hey- were you watching Wonder Woman too?’ Kris asks, glad to have someone else to hype the movie up with.

‘Hm?’ Yixing looks down at his cup before replying, ‘Oh- no, I was just thirsty.’

Kris pulls a face.

‘But I am going in now,’ Yixing grins, pointing inwards. ‘You and Myeonnie on a date?’

‘For the…13..7th? 137th time, we’re not dating,’ Kris doesn’t even bother rolling his eyes.

‘Ah! Right- sorry,’ Yixing smiles benignly, still unconvinced. He was under the impression that Kris and Junmyeon kept their “relationship” a secret because Junmyeon’s parents didn’t approve and sent “hitmen” after them to make sure they weren’t dating. Kris isn’t sure how or why Yixing thinks this; Junmyeon’s parents were completely fine with Junmyeon’s sexuality and practically considered Kris a second-son. Also, they might be rich, but they weren’t _that_ rich as to hire _hitmen_. Because according to Yixing, Junmyeon’s family were involved in the _mafia._

Kris really doesn’t know how or why Yixing cooked this story up. Yixing was something of a mystery in their university. His GPA was at a constant 4.0 despite the fact that no one has ever seen him studying. There were rumors that he was a professor from a rival university, coming to “study” here to better understand the competition, or something equally ridiculous. Kris would have scoffed at the rumors if it weren’t for the highly incriminating pictures that circulated like wildfire last year of someone who looked _an awful lot_ like Yixing, in glasses, slicked back black hair, a serious and clear expression on his face, wearing a crisp white button-down and dark grey blazer. Which was a complete opposite to Yixing’s sleepy (sometimes unfocused) eyes, unkempt blond hair, and clothes that looked like they came from a local church sale.

It was also probably a coincidence that aforementioned rival university was having a seminar in the atrium downstairs.

Yixing leans in and says in a low whisper, ‘I still support you!’.

‘Uh- thanks,’ Kris has long learned that arguing with Yixing or trying to explain something to him was close to impossible- especially if he was hell-bent on a notion he cooked up himself. So he leaves the Traditional Medicine student be.

‘Oh look! A hitman!’ Yixing exclaims, pointing with his straw in a direction behind Kris.

‘Huh?!’

Bewildered, Kris turns, wondering for a fleeting second if Yixing was right all along. But instead he’s met with the sight of Junmyeon walking towards them, eyes resigned but also irritated and a little panicked. There’s another guy walking alongside him, and Kris instantly dislikes him. He was wearing _sandals and socks_. Kris grimaces as he eyes the unknown guy. This was getting _really_ ridiculous.

‘I am gone- I don’t want to be involved in this mafia feud; it was nice knowing you,’ Yixing chirps, sliding away with his Wonder Woman cup. 

‘Kris-!’ Junmyeon is barely close enough to be heard but it’s obvious he wants to be _gone_.

‘Oh come one Myeon-‘ the guy is wheedling.

Kris is doubly irritated now- only Kris called Junmyeon that. Not some douchebag in sandals and socks.

‘Let’s go,’ Junmyeon grabs his arm and pushes them out, not allowing Kris time to maybe sock this guy in the face.

‘Hey! Hold up- come on Myeon- and who the fuck are you?’

Kris abruptly stops, turning his head sharply at the guy. What the fuck was wrong with him? It was so blatantly obvious that Junmyeon didn’t want to talk to him- didn’t he have a single shred of dignity?

‘No,’ Kris says bluntly, ignoring Junmyeon’s bewildered expression at his statement. ‘I’m Junmyeon’s best friend- he’s like, the cutest peanut to my butter, the milk to my cornflakes- and I know all of the idiots he’s friends with because I’m friends with those idiots too- so the better question is who the fuck are _you_?’

‘I’m just trying to have a conversation with him-‘

Kris stands up to his full height and he’s towering over this guy.

‘He doesn’t want to talk to you- very obviously- you’re making him uncomfortable,’ Kris spits out. ‘Look man, don’t do this- have some dignity and understand that no means no- you’re making a fool of yourself.’

The guy has the audacity to look unimpressed with Kris’s statement and instead raises his chin rather arrogantly.

‘Yeah well- not much dignity posting up pictures like that- he wants the attention.’

Kris sees red and he takes a step forward, hands clenching into fists.

‘Is everything all right here?’ a gruff voice asks.

Sandals-guy seems a little miffed when the security guard walks over, eyeing the situation with distaste and wariness.

‘t’s nothing,’ he scoffs out. ‘Not worth it anyways.’

Kris is _ready to kill this guy_ but Junmyeon sighs heavily and this gets Kris’s attention.

‘Hey- what happened?’ Kris asks, turning his attention to Junmyeon.

‘He’s from one of my general course classes,’ Junmyeon waves dismissively. ‘He’s always tried talking to me before but that was completely different.’

Kris frowns, looking over to where sandals-guy disappeared, memorizing his features so that he could accidently on purpose maybe trash him up. Maybe he would tell Zitao and Sehun about it- the two freshmen were attached to Junmyeon and jumped to help him at any given chance. Junmyeon looks wearied, a sort of heaviness lingering around him. What upsets Kris the most is how _resigned_ Junmyeon looked in regards of all this. Kris is filled again with pure frustrated anger at not only the situation surrounding Junmyeon with that Instagram post, but also with how this seemed to be the _norm_ and almost _expected_ behavior; basically forming a culture of its own. While Kris wants to be mad at Baekhyun for posting that picture of Junmyeon, he knows that it’s not Baekhyun’s fault that all these people were behaving like this. Why should anyone have to consider the possibility harassment or bullying for posting a picture that honestly wasn’t even implicit or NSFW- and even so, no one should have to face any form of negativity or practically run out of a _public bathroom_ because of how uncomfortable they felt.  

‘The _peanut_ to your _butter_?!’ Junmyeon repeats after a while, shaking Kris out of his frustrated thoughts. ‘What sort of _analogy is that_?!’

‘The greatest kind, and it was the “cutest peanut” – get it right,’ Kris replies before glancing over at Junmyeon again. ‘What class is this again?’

‘Law and Ethics in Media.’ Junmyeon replies slowly, looking at Kris suspiciously. ‘Why?’

‘No reason,’ Kris shrugs. ‘Wanna get hotpot for dinner?’

Junmyeon narrows his eyes for a moment before nodding.

‘You’re not allowed to call dibs on the beef again, you hear me?’

‘Yeah yeah, let’s go.’

 

*

 

Junmyeon’s expression is exasperated but fond at the same time when Kris casually makes his way through the lecture hall during his next Law and Ethics class. But according to Junmyeon sandals-guy hadn’t shown up at all- even to their other shared class. And that probably explained Zitao and Sehun’s overly pleased smiles earlier that morning. But Kris still sits next to him; he didn’t have class after all ( _lies_ \- he was skipping).

Kris dozes off most of the class, but registers the fact that Junmyeon sits to accommodate Kris’s head on his shoulder better. He’s vaguely aware of voices and the professor droning on and on about the importance of CSR activities when he latches on to whispered the whispered conversation Junmyeon is having with another of his classmates.

‘Boyfriend?’ female classmate.

‘Best-friend.’

_Damn right I am bitch- so you stay the fuck back._

Kris can hear the smile in Junmyeon’s voice.

‘You guys are cute,’ the other voice whispers back approvingly.

 _I guess you’re okay then_ he thinks with approval, mentally nodding at Junmyeon’s faceless classmate.

‘He prefers the term _hot_ ,’ Junmyeon chuckles lowly. Kris really likes the smell of Junmyeon’s laundry detergent. He tries not to press his nose closer into Junmyeon’s clothes- he was supposed to be asleep and not eavesdropping on his best-friend’s conversation.

‘I’m sorry about what’s happened,’ the voice says slowly. Kris feels better knowing Junmyeon’s classmates aren’t all assholes. ‘But hey- that douchebag hasn’t shown up for his other classes- rumor is that he got jumped outside of a club or something.’

Now that really explained Zitao, Sehun, _and_ Lu Han’s behavior.

‘What? Really?’ Junmyeon was probably the only person who would sound worried over the fate of the guy who was practically harassing him. Kris makes a mental note of buying Sehun and Zitao food. And maybe finally publically confirming that he was sort-of friends with Lu Han. Maybe.

‘Yeah- karma comes back around eh?’  

 

 

 

 

 

 

#3

 

 

 

 

 

Lu Han, despite being a total and complete fuck-boy, was actually a nice dude with an even nicer penthouse. Which is where Kris finds himself to celebrate not dying during their midterm week. And by celebrate it means getting tons of pizza, beer, soda, and every other available junk-food from the nearby 7-11.

They’re watching some movie- well, Lu Han, Zitao, Sehun, Jongdae, and Baekhyun are watching while Junmyeon and Kyungsoo discuss a project they had to complete by next week. Kris situates himself between the two groups- commenting on both sides occasionally and feeding _both_ Junmyeon and Kyungsoo with pizza every time they got too into their brainstorming.

Minseok, Chanyeol, Yixing, and Jongin were on their way, having just finished their last midterm exams and in desperate need for pizza.

‘This sounds like what’s been happening to Jun-hyung,’ Zitao comments, drawing Kris’s attention away from mindlessly doodling on the back of Junmyeon’s notebook, mind blissfully free of his studies and worries about his future and GPA. He was giving himself just this one night to really relax and let his mind go empty.

‘Hm?’ Junmyeon hums at the sound of his name.

‘Oh- just, the lead lady in the movie- she like, got a makeover and now she’s suddenly all famous,’ Zitao explains. ‘I thought she was great without needing all of that.’

‘Sure thing Mr. Basic Woke Straight GuyTM,’ Sehun snorts.

‘Yeah- like you’re any better,’ Zitao jabs back.

‘Movie plot,’ Lu Han defends.

Kyungsoo and Junmyeon both roll their eyes at that.

‘So obviously- for plot’s sake- the guy she’s been crushing on- her long-time childhood friend, who is your Basic Nice Straight Guy who is fucking thick in the head, only just _notices_ her,’ Zitao further explains.

‘How is that like Junmyeon?’ Kris questions, only to receive bland looks from everyone seated at the couch. Kris instinctively leans back.

They go back to the movie and Kris goes back to doodling on Junmyeon’s book. He glances up at his best-friend, studying his side-profile.

There’s a derisive scoff from Jongdae, drawing Kris’s attention away from picking out the olives from the slice of pizza he was going to give Junmyeon. (Junmyeon didn’t like olives).

‘This is fucking stupid,’ Jongdae snorts. ‘Male romantic leads are a bunch of idiots all of them. Especially the ones who are “friends” with the leading lady. They take the girl for granted up until they realize that they’re losing _possession_ over them to _another_ guy- this is some stupid alpha-male bullshit and I’m happy I am as gay as a unicorn from Uranus and happily in love with my Minnie.’

‘How did that go from being a pro-feminist statement to your undying love for Minseok?’ Kyungsoo looks impressed, momentarily glancing up from the laptop screen he was sharing with Junmyeon.

‘Jongdae can transform every subject and make it about how much he loves Minseok,’ Baekhyun snorts, stuffing his mouth with pizza. ‘Here, check this out-‘

‘Don’t-‘ Lu Han, Zitao, and Sehun are already protesting.

‘Jongdae- microwaves.’

‘Microwaves are one of the best things humans have invented- it fucking saves life, and no they aren’t being used to spy on us, the heat waves within the system will fry any electronic device that’s as fragile or delicate as an elaborate surveillance system that’s probably reliant on the wifi to send their collected data and as we all know microwaves block out wifi signals which is why you put your routers _away_ as far as possible from your microwaves. And you know how I know this? That’s right- because of Minseok. He’s so fucking smart and beautiful, I’m still shook.’ Jongdae exhales.

Lu Han, Zitao, and Sehun all groan into their hands.

‘But you’re right- and I don’t mean the Minseok part- though that’s true enough,’ Kyungsoo shrugs dismissively while Lu Han, Zitao, and Sehun all nod begrudgingly and Baekhyun whispers, ‘literally everyone is sort of in love with Minseok-hyung.’

‘-men- straight or not, realistically speaking, all have a _mine_ attitude- one of ownership, possessiveness, and the inclination towards entitlement while all being really ignorant of anything that extends past their dicks - I mean, it’s like they’re all unaware of sexual harassment women face on a daily basis until it happens to a woman they _know_. Shit like “oh yeah, I’m pro-feminist because I have a sister/daughter” I mean bitch, where the fuck were you born from?’ Kyungsoo rolls his eyes. ‘Being pro-feminist shouldn’t be a thing- not because I disagree with feminism- but because it’s fucking _common sense_ and shouldn’t be a topic of discussion amongst _men_ about its validity!’

Kyungsoo is breathing a little heavily and Kris is vaguely aware of Jongdae quietly whispering, ‘please control your boner’ to Baekhyun who is watching Kyungsoo with a dreamy look of awe.

‘Can we actually just get back to this shitty movie without me feeling like a total idiot for wanting to watch it?’ Lu Han whines. ‘Honestly I only wanted to watch it because Guan Xiaotong likes this movie.’

‘Who?’ Baekhyun inquires quizzically.

‘Lu Han’s dream girlfriend,’ Zitao supplies before adding. ‘Who by the way, is way out of your league.’

Lu Han gets up and slumps dramatically against Junmyeon who chuckles and opens his arms for the elder. Lu Han dives in, whining about how he’s trying so hard to get her attention but being elegantly and _so beautifully rejected that even though my ego is crushed I can’t help but smile oh god_.

‘Oh- she is out of your league,’ Baekhyun says, scrolling on his phone.

‘Stop burning me like this,’ Lu Han kicks, nearly catching Kris on the face.

‘How did you even find her?’ Jongdae raises his eyebrow, looking at Baekhyun’s phone. Kris looks over and spots Lu Han’s crush on Baekhyun’s phone.

‘I just went to Lu Han’s Instagram and checked out the people he follows- easy,’ Baekhyun shrugs before pressing “follow”.

Lu Han is screaming at Baekhyun and there’s a ruckus that ensues. But Kris doesn’t really pay heed- instead he’s suddenly struck. He really feels like he’s been slapped though he’s not sure _why_.

‘Kris?’

Nearly jumping out of his skin, Kris finds Junmyeon looking at him with some worry.

‘You okay?’ he asks, leaning in a little. Kris feels like he’s being slapped continuously.

‘F-fine!’ Kris stammers out. ‘Yeah- fine, I’m uh. Fine?’

Junmyeon raises one unimpressed eyebrow.

‘Stop drinking and you best finish this bottle of water in an hour,’ Junmyeon says, nudging a bottle towards him. Kris hasn’t even gone halfway through his bottle of beer but he nods dumbly anyways, gawking at Junmyeon who goes back to the laptop, discussing some marketing strategy with Kyungsoo.

‘Kris, my man, you okay?’ Jongdae asks, looking at him and then back at Junmyeon for reasons Kris cannot place but finds himself feeling oddly apprehensive about. That feeling of being slapped comes back again.

Kris is saved the need to explain when Jongin bursts in, whooping loudly and gleefully before throwing himself over onto the couch, crushing the people who were sitting there. Minseok, Chanyeol, and Yixing come in, looking relieved and a little tired. Kris watches as Minseok rescues his boyfriend from the pile of groaning bodies with ease while Chanyeol occupies Jongdae’s former position and also dives over the people on the couch.

‘Hey,’ Yixing smiles down at them, checking the laptop with a groan. ‘Please don’t do this in front of me!’

Kyungsoo laughs, amicably giving Yixing a one-shoulder hug before the latter goes to Junmyeon, latching onto his back and groaning tiredly.

‘Hey- how was your exam?’ Junmyeon smiles at Yixing who just nuzzles against his cheek for a while. Kris isn’t sure why but the pizza in his mouth is suddenly bitter.

‘Meh,’ Yixing mumbles before resting his chin on Junmyeon’s shoulder and saying, ‘By the way- I heard you got asked out by Minho the other day.’

Kris wants to spit out his pizza; had it gone bad?

‘You _what_?’ Baekhyun practically scales the couch, making his way over to the table where they were sitting.

‘Minho asked me out,’ Junmyeon shrugs though he looks a little pleased.

‘What did you say?’ Baekhyun demands.

For some reason, Jongdae is looking at him, a strange intent in his eyes. But the look is gone, and Jongdae isn’t even looking at him anymore.

‘Well- he gave me his number, and told me to give him a call when I made up my mind,’ Junmyeon replies with a badly suppressed smile.

‘Who is Minho?’ Sehun asks.

‘Senior from Performance Arts and secret rap-god,’ Jongdae supplies with a cackle before adding in a more somber tone, ‘He’s nice actually- real sweet and helpful.’

‘Will you call him?’ Yixing asks.

‘I don’t know? I haven’t thought about it to be honest,’ Junmyeon replies, patting Yixing on the cheek. ‘Been busy.’

Yixing nods and says in a quiet voice, just for Junmyeon but Kris hears it clearly.

‘Your parents okay?’

Kris is a little taken aback. There were a total of 3 people who knew about Junmyeon’s parent’s divorce.

Kris himself, and Minseok and Jongdae.

‘It’s all right,’ Junmyeon replies back quietly.

Yixing smiles and _kisses_ Junmyeon on the cheek before releasing the latter and going over to coo at Sehun (who blushes and becomes excessively shy around Yixing).

Kris pushes back his pizza, appetite long gone.

‘Are you drinking your water or not?’

Kris snaps back out of whatever strange state he had unknowingly slipped into. It was like everything sounded clearer and his vision cleared up as well. Without answering, he reaches for his bottle but knocks it off instead, splashing water down the front of his shirt and trousers.

‘J _esus Christ_ in a fucking _manger-_ ‘ Kris curses out, standing up to prevent further damage.

‘Not to get religious here, but why the fucking fuck were you taking our lord and savior Jesus Christ’s name in vain?’ Sehun raises one eyebrow.

‘You’re not even Christian,’ Zitao points out.

‘My point exactly- I wasn’t getting at it religiously- I even stated that beforehand,’ Sehun shrugs. Zitao looks like he wants to argue, raising one hand but then stops, frowning in thought as he goes over Sehun’s statement.

‘Here,’ Lu Han is handing him a kitchen towel and Kris wipes at the table where water had splashed onto. He makes quick work of the floor, not wanting to slip or have anyone else slip either. When he comes back from Lu Han’s bedroom after changing into dry clothes, he suddenly feels disembodied from the entire gathering.

‘Hey- I think I’m gonna head on back,’ Kris says as he reaches for his bag.

‘You okay?’ Junmyeon asks, looking up from the laptop with a frown.

‘I feel a bit off- I think  midterms really fucked me up,’ Kris waves his hand dismissively.

‘Yeah? You okay going back by yourself?’ Junmyeon asks as Lu Han offers to drive him back.

‘No it’s fine- you guys chill, I think I just need a good night’s sleep that isn’t riddled with nightmares about turning up naked for exams.’ Kris tries to joke.

‘I’ll pay you to see that,’ Zitao cackles before waving goodbye.

‘You sure?’ Junmyeon asks.

Kris nods in reply. And he’s not sure why, but Kris expects Junmyeon to say that he would also head back with Kris, and he’s already reaching for Junmyeon’s book, to carry it for him. But then Junmyeon just nods, unmoving from his seat and says, ‘All right- you’re gonna get a cab?’

‘I- uh, I guess-‘ Kris doesn’t know how to react, taking a little long in packing up his stuff. Junmyeon hasn’t moved from his seat. Just sits there and nods in approval at Kris’s decision before turning his attention to something Kyungsoo is saying as he points out something on the laptop screen.

Kris manages to get a hold of himself, bidding the others goodnight and messing up Lu Han’s hair just for fun.

Kris doesn’t know why but as he waves goodbye, unseen by Junmyeon who is now laughing at something Chanyeol is telling him, he feels strangely dispirited. As though his body was leaving, but his soul still remained seated at the table next to Junmyeon.

 

 

*

 

 

Kris starts to notice it more frequently now.

Junmyeon remains back in class, talking to his classmates after telling Kris that he would go back later when Kris came to pick him up the days their schedules matched up. He would say all right and leave, and when he looked back, Junmyeon’s back was turned to him, either laughing with his classmates or in deep discussion over books.

That was probably not much a situation that Kris would categorize as weirdly ominous. But other situations like where Junmyeon chooses the taxi without Kris- sitting in between Chanyeol, Jongdae, and Baekhyun instead of next to Kris near the window because Junmyeon preferred the window seat and Kris always sat in the middle to accommodate his best-friend’s comforts. Or like the time Junmyeon said he didn’t want coffee and Kris had gone to the café alone only to spot Junmyeon with Lu Han and Yixing entering the café some 30 minutes later, buying coffee.

It wasn’t as though Junmyeon had changed. He was the same as ever.

He was still caring, genuine, slightly off-sense of humor, and easily scandalized by Lu Han’s antics.

No, Junmyeon hadn’t changed, Kris realizes.

It was their relationship that was changing.

And Kris doesn’t know what to do.

 

 

 

#4

 

 

 

Kris is a man of simple routine, of simple needs, with simple expectations.

Every morning, when he doesn’t have classes, he gets up around 8. He rolls around in bed for a good 30 minutes, going through his phone, checking up on mails, social network, and maybe even do a “What Type of Pancake Are You Based on You FMK Choices” quiz before he gets out of bed (apparently he’s a Dutch Baby). He walks around his blessedly quiet and empty rooms- a small bedroom with an adjoining living/dining/kitchen/study room, while brushing his teeth. He’s not the neatest person but will make an effort to put things where they’re supposed to be. Kris believes in an easy and simple life. One where if he’s exhausted from university classes he can just collapse into his small couch without tripping over forgotten laundry, breaking dirty dishes, or knocking over forgotten glasses of water or stone-cold day-old coffee.

His blissful morning is loudly interrupted by rapid knocking on his door. Experience has taught Kris that ignoring it does nothing for him. So with a resigned sigh, he stands up and opens his door, already regretting everything because as expected, Baekhyun and Jongdae are behind the door.

‘Hyung!’ they both cry out at the same time, hasty smiles on their faces before they basically proceed to dive under his extended arms.

‘What did you do this time?’ Kris asks, closing the door.

‘Nothing! Just- have to use your bathroom!’ Baekhyun says and dives into the bathroom while Jongdae darts around before diving into Kris’s bedroom. He’s pretty sure Jongdae has slipped _under_ his bed in hiding.

Kris mentally counts down to 10 and before he even reaches 7, there’s very _angry_ knocking. Knocks could sound angry if you tried hard enough. Kris takes a deep resigned breath, opening the door to 3 possibilities.

One- it’s Kyungsoo. Baekhyun and Kyungsoo were roommates (oddly enough the two worked together very well), and sometimes Baekhyun committed the occasional unforgivable (unforgivable for around 2 hours- Kyungsoo could never stay angry at Baekhyun longer than that) offence. It normally ended with Kyungsoo rough-housing Baekhyun into submission (Kris has a feeling the latter actually enjoyed it) while the latter begged for forgiveness and placates him with offers to buy a lifetime supply of coffee.

Two- it’s Zitao. Just because it’s really easy riling up the Accounting sophomore.

Third- it’s-

‘Junmyeon-‘

Kris’s jaw drops. If it could unhinge from his jaw and fall to the ground then it would. Junmyeon’s hair is a silvery blond, wet, and this shouldn’t be effecting Kris like this.

‘I’m not here for you- I’m here for _those two assholes-‘_ Junmyeon is _seething_ , eyes narrowed into slits.

‘Uh-‘ Kris manages to say dumbly. ‘Your- your hair-‘

Junmyeon rounds up to _glare_ at Kris and the latter finds himself cowering at the sheer intensity of it and _it’s kinda hot what why am I thinking like this oh god._

‘I am _aware_. Thank you.’

Junmyeon was freakishly polite when angered. He goes over to the bathroom door and says sternly, ‘Byun Baekhyun, I know you’re in there. Come out right now, and explain to me why I have _silver_ hair and I won’t tell Kyungsoo that you want to both cuddle and fuck him. And you too Jongdae- get out of there or so help me, I will tell Minseok about the time you hired a cleaning agency to clean up the party you threw in secret in your apartment when Minseok went back home during summer break.’

Angry Junmyeon, as rare as a 4-leafed clover, was _terrifying_. Kris reminds himself to _never_ get on his best-friend’s bad side.

With genuine regret on their faces, Baekhyun and Jongdae step out in front of Junmyeon. Junmyeon sits them down on Kris’s couch and stands over them, lecturing them very calmly. For some reason, the sight of Jongdae and Baekhyun with their heads bowed, looking like puppies who were left out in the rain, with Junmyeon standing over them, paints a rather oddly endearing picture in his mind.

‘We really thought it was a light-brown,’ Baekhyun looks so genuinely upset Kris won’t be surprised if he starts crying. ‘I- we panicked- and we thought you might find it funny or-‘

Junmyeon sighs- and it sounds a lot like Kris’s mum’s disappointed sigh.

‘It’s all right- I guess I also overreacted- but wasn’t it obvious from the colour of the cream for the dye?’ Junmyeon asks.

‘We weren’t thinking,’ Jongdae says, head bowed. ‘We were just excited that hyung wanted to change his hair colour.’

Kris looks over at Junmyeon, wondering what brought this need to change his hair colour. Junmyeon had been acting…somewhat different- nothing extreme, nothing out of the ordinary. But there was a small change. And for some reason, it bothers Kris. And he can’t rightly say _why_.

‘I’m sorry,’ Baekhyun says plaintively, Jongdae following right after with his own apology.

‘Come on- it’s all right,’ Junmyeon gestures at them to stand. ‘Hyung forgives you all right? Come on.’

Kris watches with a smile from the kitchen area as Junmyeon hugs both of them before waving them away.

They wave sheepishly at Kris and depart. The moment they’re out of earshot Junmyeon lets out a high-pitched groan of truly despaired agony and slides down the wall, one hand on the door handle.

‘Why do I trust those two?’ Junmyeon asks blankly.

Kris grins, walking over and carefully removing Junmyeon’s hand from the handle and closing the door.

‘Come on Myeon- let’s dry your hair- don’t let it stay like that without treatment.’ Kris offers, holding out his hand.

Junmyeon sighs heavily again before taking Kris’s proffered hand and standing up. Kris is aware of the fact that he’s not letting go of Junmyeon’s hand as he guides them towards the bathroom where Baekhyun had hid himself. He lowers the toilet seat and makes Junmyeon sit on it who looks comically resigned to his fate.

Picking out a hair serum, Kris scoops up some of the creamy conditioner into his hands. He’s sure he’s done this before- Junmyeon has dyed his hair for him before, and Kris has styled Junmyeon’s hair before too. But why did this feel different?

Kris is a bit too aware of how Junmyeon’s eyes close, his shoulders losing some of the tenseness as he pushes the product through his new silvery strands.

‘We- we can dye your hair back?’ Kris says, gently drying the chemically burnt strands carefully. He ignores the fact that he just _fucking stuttered._ ‘If we use a nice brown, it should coat your hair and not leave it too brittle.’

Junmyeon sighs, slumping on the counter as though exhausted and resigned.

‘It’s not that- well it is, just-‘ Junmyeon reaches for the serum, studying the label. ‘Preparation for thesis, my sudden “popularity”, and the divorce is getting- well, yeah- you know.’

Kris takes the bottle of serum away from Junmyeon’s hands and squats down so that he’s somewhat eye-level with Junmyeon. To his dismay, he’s still hearing about how many people had turned their interests towards Junmyeon. And it wasn’t those superficial “booty calls” anymore either- rather most of them seemed genuine, like they really wanted to date Junmyeon. Kris’s own classmate, a genuinely Good GuyTM had asked Kris if it was all right he asked Junmyeon out. Kris of course wanted to squash that idea down at once- but realized he had no say or authority over who asked Junmyeon out. He doesn’t know if he’s asked Junmyeon and honestly Kris was too apprehensive to ask either of them about it. He understands that Junmyeon probably found turning down these offers a bit more difficult because they weren’t all just leery or with the immediate intent of getting into his pants (or getting him out of them).

‘You wanna talk about it?’ he asks, taking Junmyeon’s hands in his own.

Junmyeon shakes his head, ‘There’s no point discussing it- it won’t change the divorce or how it effects the family. They’re both trying to not include us but- I mean, seems a bit of a stretch.’

Kris doesn’t know how to respond really. His own parents had separated when he was very young.

‘They’re there. We’re all there together, but it was as though they were in completely different places- somewhere far away- away from us,’ Junmyeon shrugs before he adds, ‘Does that make sense? I was holding my mum’s hands just like this- but it was though she was somewhere else.’

Unsure why, Kris feels his heart clench- Junmyeon’s words resounding a little too hard, a little too deep in his chest.

‘But it’s fine- it’s-‘ Junmyeon sighs again. ‘It’s happening- it’s happened. And there’s nothing that can stop it now. Everyone changes, and you can’t stop that from happening.’

The clenching feeling turns into something that feels too much like pain.

‘This is nice- smells nice- what is it?’ Junmyeon asks, changing the subject and nodding at the serum.

‘Coconut,’ Kris replies slowly, shaking himself mentally before squeezing Junmyeon’s hands once and then standing up. Now wasn’t the time to get distracted and think of things he didn’t understand.

‘Does it look bad?’ Junmyeon asks quietly as Kris starts up the hairdryer.

Kris snorts, tossing the silvery strands back, revealing Junmyeon’s forehead. He wanted to say something teasing along the lines of ‘ _you look really hot- you should post up a picture on Instagram’_ to somehow make Junmyeon feel better and establish their normal banter. But instead a soft ‘You look beautiful’ comes out.

Junmyeon blinks up at him in surprise.

‘I-uh, I meant,’ Kris stammers, nearly dropping the hairdryer. ‘You- you always look beautifu- good- you always look good, you’re a good looking man. Yes. Very. Um, good.’

Junmyeon still looks at him like he’s grown two heads and Kris doesn’t know why but he feels _hopeful_ suddenly. But instead Junmyeon starts laughing. And Kris doesn’t know why this disappoints him. Junmyeon’s laughter always made him happy in turn, but for some reason, he felt strangely painful today.

Junmyeon ends up napping on his couch, hair smelling strongly of coconut serum, head leaning on Kris’s shoulder. Kris lowers the volume of the movie they were watching and looks down at his best-friend. It’s that strange painful feeling again. And Kris recognizes it now.

Junmyeon was right there. But it was as though he was slipping out. Away from Kris’s world. He recognizes it now. Ever since midterms.

And Kris is _terrified._

 

*

 

Zitao and Sehun are the ones who recolour Junmyeon’s hair and Kris watches a short clip of the process from Zitao’s Instagram story. While it was true that Sehun and Zitao were probably much more experienced with hair colouring (Sehun has coloured his hair into every possible colour available in the past year and Zitao’s hair is still incredibly soft and healthy despite maintaining a crisp platinum blond for over a year), Kris lived right next-door whereas Sehun and Zitao lived nearly 20 minutes away. He feels the gap between himself and Junmyeon expand even more and he doesn’t know what to do.

 

 

 

#5

 

 

 

It does die down. The whole Instagram fame thing.

And Junmyeon looks lighter than before. It was also probably because the divorce and everything else regarding it was finalized and finals were also now over. Well- almost over. Kris is waiting for Junmyeon to finish his last exam outside the lecture-hall, scrolling through his phone.

The past month had been oddly strange- like Kris hadn’t seen Junmyeon in forever. He puts it down to exam stress, family stress, and general schedule clash. But he does see a lot of posts up on fucking Instagram of Junmyeon being either in the foreground or background of random get-togethers. He tries not to miss Junmyeon- because that was dumb. They lived right next to each other and they still saw each other nearly every day- but no, Kris finds himself missing his best-friend.

The doors open and this time around it’s actually Junmyeon this time, unlike the past 6 times.

He smiles brightly when he notices Kris, waving with his free hand while stuffing his ID card back into his bag.

‘How was your exam?’ Kris asks, forgetting his previous thoughts in light of Junmyeon’s presence.

‘I won’t fail,’ Junmyeon laughs. ‘But I definitely won’t be getting an A that’s for sure.’

‘A’s are overrated,’ Kris snorts.

‘Yeah- and is that why you were crying over your “A-“ from your midterm paper?’ Junmyeon asks pointedly.

‘A-‘s are aesthetically displeasing okay,’ Kris grumbles while Junmyeon snorts.

‘And you?’

‘Not bad- I’d rather not talk about it,’ Kris frowns as he remembers the questions he had to face barely an hour past. ‘So- all done right?’

‘Just have one final essay to write but I’ll be done before the evening,’ Junmyeon cheers, slinging an arm around Kris’s shoulders and then rethinking it and putting his arm around his waist instead. Junmyeon once said he pulled a muscle from trying to reach Kris’s shoulders. ‘God I’m so relieved. I could sleep for _a week_.’

‘Same,’ Kris pulls Junmyeon in closer despite the summer heat, enjoying the way his much shorter best-friend felt against his side. ‘Wanna go grab our combined weight in fries and soda?’

‘As tempting as that sounds- I can’t,’ Junmyeon looks apologetic. ‘I’m going on a date later and I want to finish my final essay before that.’

‘A what?’ Kris blinks, a cold chill spreading down his back as he pauses in his tracks.

‘A date?’ Junmyeon repeats, stopping when he realized that Kris had stopped walking.

‘With who?’ Kris asks, and he’s shocked he sounds angry. Shit- this wasn’t what he wanted to sound like. He wasn’t even angry. He doesn’t know how he feels- but he’s pretty sure he’s not angry, and that too, at Junmyeon.

Junmyeon, who obviously despite his ability to understand Kris’s sometimes senseless ramblings and logic, doesn’t have insight into the inner workings of his mind. So he looks both surprised and irritated at Kris’s tone of voice.

‘With someone who asked me out?’ Junmyeon replies, one eyebrow raised, clearly challenging Kris into saying more.

‘Are you sure?’ Kris asks, he knows he sounds unnecessarily rough and rude. ‘Myeon- people were throwing themselves at you for a good part of this semester- what if it’s just a result of that and this person just wants to-‘

Junmyeon’s eyebrows furrow- and it’s past the 70% confused 20% annoyed and 10% wary balance and instead now 80% irritation, 10% disbelief, and 10% _hurt_.

‘Kris,’ his voice is clear and steady. ‘I understand that you’re just worried and concerned. So I hope that you understand that I am a grown adult, and I can make my decisions for myself.’

‘Myeon- no, I’m not saying you can’t-‘ Kris tries to salvage. That feeling of being slapped is back again.

‘Good.’ Junmyeon says with a tone of finality. ‘I’m headed back; I’ll see you later.’

Kris has never, in his entire life of knowing Junmyeon, been dismissed like this before. He watches, stunned, as Junmyeon walks away from him. A sight he’s not used to.

‘Junmyeon I’m really-‘ he tries but Junmyeon is already too far. ‘-…sorry…’

Panic builds inside of Kris and his mind is screaming at him to go to Junmyeon but his body has disconnected from his mind and he’s stuck. He’s not sure how long he’s been just standing there until Baekhyun appears, looking puzzled.

‘Hyung? You okay?’

Kris shakes his head slowly.

‘Um- do you want me to call Junmyeon-hyung? He left the exam room before me but I think he’s still around-‘

‘-did you hear about the date?’

‘The date-? Oh-‘ Baekhyun has a look of understanding on his face before he squints up at Kris. ‘What did you say?’

Kris can’t even be bothered to feel offended by Baekhyun’s immediate suspicion that something bad had happened and it was Kris’s doing. Something clicks inside Kris’s head and before he knows it he splutters out.

‘Has Junmyeon been in love with me all this time?’

Baekhyun doesn’t look surprised- instead he raises a single eyebrow at Kris and says, ‘I don’t think you should be talking to me about this.’

Kris doesn’t reply and Baekhyun tilts his head, still looking up at Kris.

‘I think…I think I’ve really fucked up.’ Kris says quietly.

Baekhyun actually smiles a bit at that and says, ‘Realization and acceptance is the first step you take to recovery.’

‘Right- I need to go talk-‘

‘-to Junmyeon?! Nice!-‘

‘-to Minseok…’

‘…that works too…’

 

*

 

Kris knocks rapidly on Minseok and Jongdae’s apartment door, hoping at least _one_ of them was home (but preferably Minseok). Instead it’s _Lu Han_ who opens the door and Kris already takes a step back.

‘Will you be quiet!’ Minseok appears behind Lu Han. ‘Dae’s finally asleep!’

Kris tries to make himself small as Minseok glowers at him. Honestly, Minseok with un-styled hair, a sleeveless shirt, shorts, and all his tattoos on display was nothing short of terrifying.

‘Uh-‘

‘Jongdae’s sick,’ Lu Han explains and adds, ‘He’s got a pretty bad fever. He’s asleep now.’

‘Oh I guess-‘

‘Are you all right?’ Minseok asks, approaching the door looking concerned now that his initial irritation simmered down.

‘I- I don’t know,’ Kris replies honestly. ‘I wanted to talk to you- if that’s all right.’

‘Yeah sure,’ Minseok waves him in as Lu Han opens the door wider, stepping back to allow Kris in. ‘Is this about Junmyeon?’

‘How did you know?’

‘I was sort of expecting you to show up to be honest,’ Minseok shrugs, taking a seat on the couch and waving him over again.

‘Should I leave?’ Lu Han asks, sounding and being unexpectedly thoughtful.

‘No- uh, I’d like to know your input as well,’ Kris replies.

They sit down, Minseok in front of him and Lu Han to his side.

‘What happened?’ Minseok asks.

‘Um- well,-‘

‘Is this about Junmyeon going on a date later tonight?’ Lu Han asks.

‘Uh yeah- how did you know?’ Kris asks.

‘Most of us knew? He told us yesterday?’ Lu Han replies. ‘He didn’t tell you?’

‘Well…he told like 15 minutes ago.’

‘Hmm,’ Lu Han’s expression is unreadable before he asks, ‘So- I’m guessing you know?’

Kris sort of closes and opens his mouth a few times before he nods stiffly.

‘What’s stopping you from telling him?’ Minseok asks. ‘You know now that Junmyeon loves you- and now you’ve realized that you’ve always loved him too. What’s stopping you?’

There’s the feeling of being slapped again. Except this time Kris identifies what it is.

Hearing it out loud, stately so factually, Kris feels every tense ribbon of sheer anxiety, confusion, and fear snap off, leaving him suspended in a state of being neither here nor there.

‘Do you know how Dae and I got together?’ Minseok asks instead.

Kris, for all the poems, songs, and monologues he’s heard from Jongdae about how in love he is with Minseok, has never really heard about how it all began.

‘I always just assumed you two were dating since you were both born,’ Lu Han quips in. Both Minseok and Kris ignore him.

‘Well- we were neighbours you know?’ Minseok looks away briefly, eyes gleaming as though reliving some memory. ‘We became friends at once- _best-friends_.’

Minseok smiles at Kris.

‘I think I started to realize that I liked Dae when I was around 17-‘

‘-cradle robber.’ Lu Han coughs out before actually coughing for real, being elbowed by Minseok’s muscled tattooed arm.

‘-and I didn’t know if he was even into guys- puberty is confusing you know? And I was older than him- I was confused at myself, and even more confused when I saw Dae. I did that stupid thing most teenagers do; I tried distancing myself and god I was miserable. Dae was really confused- like he thought _he_ did something wrong you know? I even tried dating – which was funny because I did go on a few dates before I had this realization; but it felt so wrong I stopped. I never understood why none of my dates ever felt right- then it hit me. Jongdae heard about my dates and I think- he just had this really…I wouldn’t say sad- it was more of he looked like he was telling himself not to feel hurt. And I really realized how much of a dumbass I was.’ Minseok chuckles, shaking his head. ‘I was projecting my fears and doubts into Jongdae and coming up with assumptions based on that without thinking or considering Jongdae himself. So I decided to stop overthinking, stop overanalyzing, and just tell him.’

‘And now here you both are- disgusting as ever,’ Lu Han wiggles his fingers as he mimes confetti falling in the air.

‘What did you tell him?’ Kris asks.

‘That I’ve always been in love with him- but I was just really stupid and never thought of _him_ in this process and only saw the situation through my eyes,’ Minseok replies, glancing over at the closed door. ‘When I put myself out of the situation and looked at him- at _us_ \- I realized that I was always in love with Dae, and that he’d always loved me too- and that he was who and what made me who I was- who I am.’

Lu Han looks so moved his eyebrows are doing a weird thing, making him look constipated.

‘I mean Dae did kind of shut down at first, and like, pretty much left me on read except in real life and like, hid for a solid 3 days after I sort of blurted all of this out to him in the middle of playing Halo 3.’

‘I can’t imagine you being _that_ awkward,’ Lu Han frowns. ‘Kris sure, but you? Sounds fake but okay.’

‘Yeah but, on the fourth day he came over and said that I was really fucking late, and he was surprised I was the older one when he had come to terms with his feelings a few years ago,’ Minseok grins. ‘Then he grabbed me and kissed me and then we-‘

‘-that’s all we want to know,’ Lu Han says firmly. 

‘So…so I should just- I should just tell him?’ Kris says, unsure. ‘But- that feels so…’

‘Do you feel like Junmyeon won’t take you seriously?’ Minseok asks. ‘Like you’re only saying this because you think he’ll think you’re afraid of losing the time you devote to each other or something along that line?’

‘Exactly!’ Kris says emphatically. ‘Oh god- have I been _that_ Douche-BagTM like in those romance films? But- oh god, it’s not like that-‘

‘It’s not,’ Minseok nods in agreement. ‘Just ask yourself this- who do you see with you 1, 5, 10, 20, 50 years into the future. What does your life always consist of? I ask myself that sometimes- and sometimes it changes- and that’s fine too; but I always have 3 things included in that list.’ Minseok holds up his fingers. ‘Jongdae. My relationship with Jongdae. And our combined state of wellbeing and happiness.’

Lu Han looks constipated again.  

‘I…’ Kris thinks hard but finds that he doesn’t have to.

He’s always seen Junmyeon with him- no matter what scenario. Junmyeon is always included in his plans, always included in his ideas, even in his dreams he’s always somehow there- a constant and stable fixture in his life and _how did I never realize this before?!_

‘Fam; it’s honestly not that deep,’ Lu Han looks highly amused. ‘This isn’t some stupid movie- I mean, you _are_ pretty stupid, but like, you’re not being a douche-bag here. You’ve matured- you’ve come to understand – a rite of passage if you will.’

Minseok who had looked quite impressed with the former half of Lu Han’s speech, rolls his eyes towards the end.

‘Kris- just think about what Junmyeon means to you.’ Minseok smiles, looking very un-threatening despite the 7 piercings on his face alone and jet black neck tattoos on his neck. 

Junmyeon was more than just familiarity he associated himself with coming to a new place.

Junmyeon was _home_ \- he was everything Kris wanted and needed. And he _had_ him. But now, Kris isn’t too sure anymore. Kris realizes, with a sickening nauseas feeling, that he was doing exactly what he wanted to protect Junmyeon from. He’d taken advantage of Junmyeon’s caring nature, his kindness, his warmth, without knowing what he was doing to him.

It wasn’t fear of losing their friendship or the time they spend with each other that makes Kris panic. It’s the realization that Junmyeon had always placed his love with Kris and he had been too blind to see it. Too blind to see, but apparently very aware of it the whole time. And now he was close to losing it.

‘You’ve always been in love with him,’ Minseok shakes his head in amusement. ‘You just never realized.’

Kris wants to bang his head on the wall.

Minseok and Lu Han look at him as though they too wanted to bang his head against the wall. Maybe he should let them do it.

But instead Kris squares his shoulders, determination flooding his veins and he nods once.

‘Right. I’m leaving.’

Lu Han and Minseok both look, rightfully, taken aback.

‘Uh-‘

‘Yifan-‘

‘I’m an idiot- a real fucking _potato_ -‘ Kris states. ‘I have the _best_ best-friend in the entire fucking universe- and we could have been more and I probably fucked that up. But I sure as _fuck_ am not going to lose Junmyeon from my life- in every way or form-‘

‘Sto _p with the monologue and fucking move already!’_ Lu Han screams but his scream is short-lived as Minseok practically punches him to shut him up, eyes immediately latching onto to the bedroom door in fear.

Kris jolts, eyes widening in panic and more or less vaults out.

‘Wait-!’

But Kris ignores Minseok’s call and instead sprints out of the lab.

Junmyeon was literally an angel sent down to Earth and Kris was _fucking blessed_ to have him in his life. It didn’t matter anymore, how their relationship would turn out or if Junmyeon doesn’t return his feelings. This wasn’t about Kris. He would show and tell Junmyeon just how beautiful a person he was- and how he deserved every good thing in this _universe_.

But first he needed to apologize.

Then he would wax poetry if needed, to show Junmyeon just how grateful he was for having him in his life.

 

 

+1

 

 

Or that was the plan some 10 minutes ago. Because right now Kris’s out-of-breath body and reeling mind cannot handle what he’s seeing right now despite having seen it so many times before.

Damn Baekhyun for being right about Junmyeon looking good with glasses. When Junmyeon opens his apartment door (because despite having a key, Kris doesn’t think Junmyeon would appreciate him bursting in), confused, still a little annoyed, but nonetheless welcoming as usual, he’s wearing his glasses. It’s nothing special- Kris _knows_ this- Junmyeon’s just in sweatpants, and an old shirt Kris is pretty sure that belonged to him at one point.

He’s suddenly _really really fucking scared._

‘Oh hey- what’s up?’ Junmyeon asks despite the fact that they had their argument barely 6 hours ago.

‘Uh-‘

‘Give me a moment! I had this brilliant conclusion for my essay!’ Junmyeon exclaims, rushing back to his laptop and typing away furiously.

This gives Kris time to gather his thoughts. Or so he thinks. The silence that follows is rather suffocating. At least for Kris- he’s not sure how Junmyeon is doing but he’s still typing steadily and his back is turned to Kris.

‘You know, you were right,’ Junmyeon speaks up, not turning around. His fingers still moving over the keyboard. ‘I wasn’t thinking it through properly. I checked the guy out on social media- asked Baekhyun and Lu about him as well. Just wanted a summer fling or something.’

‘I-‘

‘No- it’s fine,’ Junmyeon waves his hand dismissively before typing again. ‘I’m not interested in pursuing a relationship anyways.’

Kris ignores the chunk of ice that falls through his stomach and down to his feet.

There’s some final sounding taps on the laptop and Junmyeon finally turns around, giving Kris a wry smile.

‘I’m sorry I yelled at you- it wasn’t a nice thing to do-‘ Junmyeon is _apologizing_ and Kris could pull out his hair. Also, Junmyeon hadn’t even _yelled_ \- he’d just…spoken in his normal volume. Though that did make the entire thing a whole lot more frightening.

‘No- Myeon, please don’t,’ Kris nearly shaves his knees off as he skids over the carpet to awkwardly kneel before Junmyeon, doing anything he could to stop the other man from apologizing.

‘Uh Kris-‘

‘ _I’m_ sorry- I’m the one who should be apologizing and not you,’ Kris says firmly.

‘I uh- that’s good, but like, you could do that a little bit, you know, away.’

Kris realizes he’s awkwardly looming over Junmyeon in his chair, bracketing him in with his arms.

‘Oh-‘ Kris stumbles backwards, sitting on his ass instead.

‘And it’s all right,’ Junmyeon smiles but it’s not the smile Kris adores. ‘We were both stupid and we have both apologized. And that’s in the past now. We’re all right- right?’

Well technically yes they were all right- but now knowing what he knew, and knowing what he felt, and with how stupid he felt- Kris was feeling pretty reckless at this point and so instead he says, ‘No- we’re not. We’re not okay.’

Junmyeon’s eyes widen with worry.

‘Kris-‘

‘You’re honestly the best person I know.’

‘Kris-‘

‘I’m not exaggerating- you really are.’ Kris ploughs on. ‘You are kind, generous, so fucking smart, caring- you have such a wide range of just _sheer warmth_ that’s so genuine- sometimes I wonder if you’re even real- and how on earth we even became friends.’

‘You’re really exaggerating there-‘ Junmyeon shifts, looking uncomfortable and his eyes are darting all over the place, jittery nerves suddenly oozing out of him.

‘Not just friends- we became best-friends and the most shocking part out of all of that was that you _agreed_ and kept continuing calling yourself my best-friend.’ Kris points at himself to emphasize his point. Which point was he trying to make, he’s not sure, but now that he’s talking, it’s going on nonstop.

_All right- you’ve apologized. And you’ve told Junmyeon he’s the human embodiment of sunshine, puppies, babies smiling, and unicorns. Right. What was next?_

‘You’ll always be my best-friend Kris,’ Junmyeon says quietly, still not looking at him in the eye.

‘Are you sure?’ Kris presses. ‘Honestly- I’ve been really introspective these days- like, what do you even see in me that could remotely qualify me as your best-friend.’

Junmyeon looks up at that, already protesting.

‘I have some more stuff to say- please, I just- I just want to-,’ Kris gestures violently in the air, hoping Junmyeon would understand this rambling. Junmyeon apparently does and he nods, leaning in to listen albeit still confused and even more nervous.

 _God,_ Junmyeon was honestly too good a person. Even after that stupid display of emotion Kris put up and his sub-par apology, he was still willing to give Kris his time and _listen_ to him, and accept what he had to say. What was he even going to say? _Oh right-_

‘I am an idiot. A huge fucking idiot, and I am not just saying this, or feeling like this because I’m scared to lose you- or scared to lose the place I have with you- I mean I’m not trying to implicate or imply that I have a place with you- I have no say in saying what or who has a place in your heart but _I_ do- I mean I have a place for you in my heart- and I am scared to lose you- but it’s not just because of-‘ Kris waves emphatically. ‘-because of some stupid possessive alpha-male behavior bullshit or something like that all these stupid romantic male leads have I’m just- well, I mean, I guess-‘

‘Kris! What are you trying to say!?’ Junmyeon looks _really_ confused.

‘I uh- what I mean to say, out of all of that- is that I am so in love with you and I’m so fucking mad it took Baekhyun’s fucking Instagram post to start off this entire series of events for me to realize that I was probably born under the luckiest star- and not just for meeting you and befriending you and you somehow finding it in you to want to still be friends with me despite me being an idiot and even an asshole to you,’ Kris states in under one breath. He takes another breath and continues. ‘Also not to mention this whole enlightenment to how _fucked up_ the society we live in is- I really sort-of-marginally understand my mother and female cousins now when they’re talking about how _stupid_ men are- _I’m_ stupid- and I will do everything in my ability to fucking fix that and I’m so mad it took me Baekhyun’s fucking post to realize this-‘

‘Oh _my god will you shut up!_ ’ Junmyeon shrieks.

He actually _shrieks._ He stands as well, pacing around looking extremely distressed and Kris is about 2 seconds from throwing himself off of the building.

Kris stands as well- unsure what to do as Junmyeon paces about, clearly beside himself with…with anger? Frustration? What was Junmyeon feeling? Kris sort of hovers, unsure what to do.

Junmyeon pauses, takes a deep breath before turning to _glare_ at Kris.

‘So what are you going to do about it?’ he demands.

‘…uh-‘ Kris is at a loss.

‘You said you’re in love with me. And that you were and are still an idiot. So what are you going to do about it?’ Junmyeon explains, tone dripping with exasperation and as well as something that was a lot like hysteria.

‘I uh- I’ll…work on the idiot part? I really will? It’s uh- part of my quarter-life crisis exploration leading up to being a sane, productive and actively _woke_ person trying to make a difference?’ Kris tries.

‘And?!’

‘Um- I’ll…I’m not…I’m not expecting anything, I’m just- I don’t know-‘ Kris stammers, wondering if it was too late to throw himself off of the building. This was probably the reason why Minseok had called him back- to think this through. He clearly had not thought through anything.

‘What do you want?’ Junmyeon asks, his voice softer and almost fragile.

‘I…’ Kris feels tongue-tied but then suddenly it hits him.

‘I want this- I want us,’ he says slowly. ‘What we have- what we are. I want what we had in the past- I want what we have right now- I want what we will be in the future. Together. And- and if that means being best-friends, then that would make me really really fucking happy.’

Kris pauses to take a breath, his eyes never leaving Junmyeon’s who looks downright _pained_ by Kris’s words.

‘But if we continue together- as more than just best-friends- where I can tell you how much I love you, where I can hold you and kiss you and make you happy everyday- then that would…that would _make_ my life.’

Junmyeon is just _staring_ at him and Kris fidgets again.

Then Junmyeon makes his way towards Kris, expression unreadable and Kris is honestly expecting a punch at this point (well deserved, he thinks blankly) but instead Junmyeon throws his arms around him.

 _God_ Kris has never felt _so_ complete than he did at this very moment. The strange feeling of somehow being suspended neither here nor there is replaced with a firm and stable anchored security, attaching him quite perfectly to the man in his arms.

‘I really am sorry,’ Kris whispers quietly. ‘Sorry it took me this long- sorry I kept hurting you, and for being an asshole. Sorry for not having noticed sooner.’

Junmyeon nods into his chest, whispering back quietly, ‘Thank you- and it’s…you never hurt me- you didn’t owe me anything.’

‘I was still dumb.’

‘I was dumb too,’ Junmyeon mumbles. ‘And I’m sorry too.’

‘There’s nothing to be sorry about,’ Kris kisses the top of his head.

If Kris had any form of awareness left inside his head outside of the blissed out state he was currently existing in, then he would be screaming at him _WHY WERE YOU SUCH A DUMBASS OMFG YOU COULD HAVE HAD THIS FOR **YEARS**. **YEARS**._

‘You’re really in love with me?’ Junmyeon asks after a few moments, before adding, ‘I mean- I guess I’m just that great a person-‘

They laugh, shaking against each other.

‘You are,’ Kris tries his best but his voice still shakes a little. ‘And I really am. I have been- and I always will.’

Junmyeon just holds him all the tighter.

‘Yeah,’ he breathes out against his chest. ‘All right then.’

‘Okay?’

‘Okay.’

‘…did we just have a _Fault in Our Stars_ moment.’

‘…Yifan.’

Kris snorts, nuzzling Junmyeon’s hair for a moment before they separate a little.

‘I’m exhausted,’ Junmyeon sighs out. ‘Too many emotions in one day.’

Kris grins, pulling them back to the couch. He understands what Junmyeon means. His arms and legs feel heavy and he wants nothing more than to lie down.

‘Nap?’

Junmyeon nods, sighing deeply though he has a smile on his face.

Kris leans back on the couch- one where he’s napped on many times before. But this time he holds his arms out for Junmyeon whose smile is growing larger with every second. He settles against Kris, an arm wrapped around his torso and Kris weaves their legs together.

Kris exhales out, relief and contentment flooding him.

‘So. Essay done?’ he asks.

This felt perfect. Almost exactly like before- but infinitely better now just like this.

‘Hm- conclusion was really difficult- but I had a great idea; I decided to quote and summarize Francis Bacon towards the end and rounded it off neatly.’ Junmyeon says before yawning.

‘That’s good- makes me want to eat bacon too.’

Junmyeon huffs out a laugh, ‘Do you even know what the essay was about?’

‘Nopes- but I know you’ve done a great job, and anything with bacon is already a winner.’ Kris adds as an afterthought. ‘Also- potatoes and bacons are great together.’

Junmyeon laughs out loud and Kris delights in the way his laughter shakes them both. He reaches up to brush through Junmyeon’s hair, lightly scratching at his scalp. Junmyeon leans into the touch, smiling with his eyes closed. His glasses were a little skewed and probably not comfortable like this.  So Kris carefully takes off his glasses, settling them on the table to the side. Junmyeon opens his eyes, looking delightfully sleepy and…exactly the same way Kris felt.

Now that they were here, he wasn’t nervous, he wasn’t agitated,- he wasn’t feeling the thrill of exploring a new relationship that most people did when they first start dating. But rather, he felt at ease. Like Junmyeon’s weight over him like this was the norm in his life. Like this was how it was supposed to be.

‘You really are beautiful,’ Kris grins, rubbing at the slightly red spot on the bridge of Junmyeon’s nose while the latter rolls his eyes. ‘I mean it.’

‘Sure thing you tuber.’

Kris sniggers, holding Junmyeon closer.

‘I can show you just how beautiful you are,’ he whispers low in Junmyeon’s ear, pressing a fleeting kiss right on the curve of his ear.

Junmyeon head-butts him accidently as a result and they both groan in pain.

‘I forgot about your big head,’ Junmyeon hisses, holding his forehead in pain while Kris cups his chin gingerly, blinking away the tears that formed as a result of the stinging pain radiating across his face. They end up laughing, wincing still. Kris turns them to their side, his face pressed up against Junmyeon’s. He can feel Junmyeon’s smile against cheek.

‘Best boy-friends?’

Junmyeon laughs, looking up, eyes twinkling the exact same way they did when Kris first met him 8 years ago. He leans in to press their lips together and it feels _so right_ before says, ‘Yeah- sounds good.’

 

 

 

*

 

 

‘Congratulations,’ Lu Han deadpans, pouting in the corner after Kris and Junmyeon arrive, casually holding hands.

‘What’s up with him?’ Junmyeon asks Chanyeol as he takes a seat next to him on the university park bench.

‘He’s just upset that his dream girl liked Yixing’s photo and commented “cute”-‘

‘She’s my _cousin_!’ Yixing exclaims looking comically upset. ‘We’re _family_ \- you don’t have to be jealous-‘

Minseok snorts, rolling his eyes before shooting Kris a grin before feeding Jongdae a cube of watermelon. The latter still looked a little under the weather but he was as cheerful as ever, laughing heartily as he watches Lu Han.

‘I’VE MADE MY INTEREST SO OBVIOUS!’ Lu Han wails. ‘But she just goes around and sweetly calls me _ge-ge_ and it’s so cute but at the same time I’m so fucking frustrated and-‘

‘-he means horny.’ Sehun and Zitao say at the same time while Jongin chokes on a piece of guava at their statement.

‘EVEN JUNMYEON IS GETTING SOME!’ Lu Han points at Junmyeon’s neck that honestly wasn’t even exposed but upon closer inspection, faint discolouration could be seen.

‘What does that even mean-‘ Junmyeon splutters, both embarrassed and indignant while Kris flings a grape at Lu Han, hitting him quite perfectly between the eyes.

Lu Han dramatically flails and lands on the grass, making dying sounds.

‘You’re trying too hard,’ Kyungsoo chimes in from where he’s lying down and occupying one whole bench, head on Baekhyun’s lap. The latter looks extremely happy, playing with Kyungsoo’s hair despite it being very short.

‘But-‘

Yixing, undoubtedly frustrated, _stands up_ and actually screams. Loudly.

‘MAYBE IF YOU STOPPED CALLING YOUR DICK A FLUTE YOU MIGHT GET SOMEWHERE!’

 

 

 

 

*

 

 

 

**Author's Note:**

> I am perhaps, a little too invested in krisho and am absolute XiuChen trash. Bye.   
> So this was a WIP I had but I forgotten all about and it was like 80% complete. But then I started writing and it ended up like this and I’m not sure what it’s become because it was supposed to be a lot funnier than this but somehow came up like a campaign for…idk, awareness? Feminism? What being woke really means? It’s become something of a weird mess but yeah, I hope you all enjoyed this? I can’t believe I nearly wrote 16k without knowing where I was headed wtf.  
> Though kris’s overthinking is something I do go through. Like, I get stuck thinking about relationships and how much of it is really just dependency or settling for someone or is it healthy- is it unhealthy. What constitutes as healthy, what makes it unhealthy. What does it mean.  
> I’m sorry to inflict my own existential crisis on anyone who might read this through KrisHo I swear that wasn’t the purpose.  
> I also just kept wanting to write about Lu Han and his flute. And on a serious note I hope he’s happy and they make a really cute couple. I find it hilarious that she’s a BTS fan. Idk why. 
> 
>  
> 
> So yeah...please enjoy this fluffiness??? *sighs*


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